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\u63d0\u4f9b\u591a\u5143\u5316\u5bc6\u96c6\u5f0f\u652f\u63f4<\/p>\n

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\u25c6\u300c\u8cfd\u99ac\u6703\u5bb6\u727d\u5e0c\u671b\u8a08\u5283\u300d<\/p>\n

\u67e5\u8a62\uff1a3552 5253<\/p>\n

\u96fb\u90f5\uff1alinkinghopes@nlpra.org.hk<\/a><\/p>\n

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\u7de8\u8f2f\uff1a\u8521\u66c9\u5f64<\/p>\n

https:\/\/health2.mingpao.com\/ftp\/Health2\/20170717\/news\/_17YC003_.jpg\u9023\u7d50\u5bb6\u5ead\u2014\u2014\u5a5a\u59fb\u4e0d\u55ae\u662f\u5169\u500b\u4eba\u7684\u4e8b\uff0c\u4e00\u6bb5\u5a5a\u59fb\u9023\u7d50\u7740\u5169\u500b\u5bb6\u5ead\uff0c\u4ee3\u8868\u7740\u592b\u5a66\u4e8c\u4eba\u5171\u540c\u9762\u5c0d\u5169\u500b\u5bb6\u5ead\u5e36\u4f86\u7684\u6311\u6230\u53ca\u554f\u984c\u3002\uff08\u8cc7\u6599\u5716\u7247\uff09;<\/inline><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

【明報專訊】婚姻從來都不是兩個人的事,一段婚姻連結着的不是兩個獨立個體,而是兩個家庭。一紙婚書除了是愛的象徵,也代表了夫婦二人願意共同面對及承擔由兩個家庭帶來的挑戰及問題。本着「合則來、不合則去」的思想,對很多香港人來說,「婚姻」關係從來不存在「委曲求全」,這心態正反映在近年持續上升的離婚數字中。而離婚後再組織新家庭的情况於香港亦很常見,「再婚」讓更多家庭連結在一起。<\/p>\n

李先生跟第一任妻子育有一個就讀初中的兒子,離婚後他跟兒子搬回母親家,而現任妻子於結婚後亦遷入同住,一年半後誕下女兒,一家五口,三代同堂,住在同一屋檐下。<\/p>\n

李太一直努力擔起媳婦、妻子、繼母和母親的角色,由於憐惜繼子沒有一個完整的家庭,所以待他甚至比自己的親生女兒還要好,供書教學之餘,閒時更會陪伴兒子到處遊玩。不過,由於李太對小叔和大姑對待奶奶的惡劣態度看不過眼,經常直斥其非;因此無論李太多努力融入這個家庭,她始終得不到丈夫及夫家家人的稱讚與認同。<\/p>\n

一個家包括幾多人?<\/p>\n

懷着女兒的時候,複雜的家庭關係令李太的情緒出現變化。在一次產檢中,醫生察覺李太的鬱結情緒,於是將她轉介至新生精神康復會,再在社工轉介下,開始接受家庭治療,希望以專業方法幫助他們一家渡過難關。在治療過程中,李太道出她覺得丈夫永遠把自己家人放在第一位,當有爭執時從不會站在妻子的一邊,令李太覺得自己只是「外人」。而李先生則認為太太過於自我中心,經常無理取鬧,一家人應該和和氣氣、互相遷就,所以主張太太凡事息事寧人。<\/p>\n

寡言夫遇上率直妻<\/p>\n

其實夫妻倆是性格截然不同的人,李太欣賞丈夫寡言,不會嘮叨;而李先生亦欣賞太太直率,不需猜度其心思。可是偏偏就是這兩種性格,讓兩人在處理家庭關係上困難重重。<\/p>\n

「家」對於李太來說只有五個人(夫婦二人、一雙兒女及奶奶),但對於李先生而言,「家」還包括他的姊弟,而夾在家人中間的李先生一向害怕處理這些關係,往往選擇沉默應對。最後,在家庭治療師的協助下,丈夫說出心底話,他很感激妻子為他所做的一切,只是不懂如何表達。得到丈夫的安慰、諒解和支持,李太也願意積極控制情緒,嘗試解開困局。<\/p>\n

愛屋及烏 修補關係<\/p>\n

夫妻經過一段時間共同努力後,關係終見改善。李先生會主動接李太下班,抽時間享受二人世界,節日時送贈小禮物製造驚喜,以行動向妻子表達感激與支持。不過李先生最大的轉變,在於他學會在自己家人面前維護太太,做到了妻子對他的期望。李先生的改變感動了李太,她也主動與夫家家人修補關係,甚至致電小叔邀請他們回家吃飯。縱使這是一件吃力不討好的事,但李太覺得丈夫致力維護她,她也願意愛屋及烏。<\/p>\n

在這條艱難的婚姻道路上,家庭治療師的治療恍如良方,讓李先生和李太了解到當初選擇走進婚姻,全是因為愛。面對兒子即將來臨的青春期轉變及小女兒的成長,李太相信將來會有更多的考驗等着他們夫婦以及整個家庭,不過因為有愛,所以二人都會堅持攜手走過每個難關,捍衛這段婚姻。<\/p>\n

■知多啲<\/p>\n

時代改變家庭組合 「難念的經」更複雜<\/p>\n

自古至今,家庭一直是社會的基礎,隨社會文化進步及時代變遷,家的組合變得多元化,這正好反映了社會的多元性。回想數十年前,香港家庭組合主要由祖父母、父母及子女組成,最複雜的家庭組合也可能是多了叔叔嬸嬸等由幾房人組成的大家庭。<\/p>\n

時至今日,新來港移民家庭、單親家庭、家庭內有特殊教育需要的孩子、隔代教養等等各類家庭的數目愈來愈多。就算是香港傳統的家庭組合也因為時代改變,面對不同問題,例如父母工作時間長與子女缺乏溝通,夫妻間對教育子女方法的思想分歧等,如果不直視這些多元化家庭組合的需要及潛在家庭問題,不單會影響家庭各成員間的關係,也有可能會影響到家庭成員的精神健康。<\/p>\n

家無寧日 不利精神健康<\/p>\n

新生精神康復會(新生會)早前訪問了俄亥俄州立大學社會工作學院教授李慕儀,她認為,家庭是其中一種人與人相處的關係,家庭成員互相照顧與扶持,在彼此互動間牽動各人的情緒,而家庭關係對個人精神健康的影響也會隨年齡變化。尤其是家庭佔據生活中的絕大部分,所以家庭關係會比較影響兒童的精神健康。<\/p>\n

家庭是一個互動性的情景,所以不同家庭也有不同需要。為配合不同家庭的需要,綜合家庭及系統治療(Integrated Family and Systems Treatment,簡稱I-FAST)應運而生。新生會自2010年由美國引入I-FAST的輔導及支援計劃。於2016年獲香港賽馬會慈善信託基金捐助,啟動「賽馬會家牽希望計劃」。<\/p>\n

提供多元化密集式支援<\/p>\n

計劃以I-FAST作為涵蓋的理論架構,旨在為受精神病或情緒的人士及其父母、配偶和家庭成員,提供多元化及多層面的密集式支援,透過家庭輔導、多元家庭小組、家庭身心靈活動、家庭朋輩支援、社區教育推廣及專業同工培訓課程等,以推動家庭成員發揮獨特的優勢,促進家庭關係和強化家庭功能,提升社區人士對受精神病困擾人士及其家庭的認識及接納。<\/p>\n

◆「賽馬會家牽希望計劃」<\/p>\n

查詢:3552 5253<\/p>\n

電郵:linkinghopes@nlpra.org.hk<\/a><\/p>\n

註:資料由新生精神康復會提供<\/p>\n

文:黃宗保(新生精神康復會專業服務經理(社區服務)、註冊社工)<\/p>\n

編輯:蔡曉彤<\/p>\n

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